bad news comes in three's...bad news #3

soon i will be living alone.

Sometimes roommates can be bad...but when you get a roommate who is great, you want to hold onto them for as long as you can...until you find a permanent roommate for life, that is. Lauren is the best roommate for me. She was when we lived together three years ago with Anne in the duplex. That's where she taught me how to make Swedish pancakes and how to properly do my laundry (whites with whites, colors with colors - DUH!). Her room was in the basement of the duplex and always cooler in the summer time, so I'd sneak down there and sleep with her every once in a while and we'd watch an Audrey Hepburn film as we fell asleep. Then we lived with my parents for a couple months before she moved to CA and I moved to the UK. That was random, huh Lo?! For the third time, she moved in with me when she came back from CA. Which is where we are today.

She is the best roommate, which is why I don't think I can top her. I suppose I'll keep my eyes and ears open for potentials but I'm thinking living alone is the way to go. I know that because I'm terrified of it.

Honestly, I'm afraid to live alone. What will I do with all this time...by myself. Will the silence make me lonely? I am a strange version of an introverted-extrovert. I cherish my alone time because I love to be around people so often. What will happen when I am alone now most of the time? Will I still want to be alone or will I always want to have someone around or something entertaining me? I love coming home, walking in the door and seeing Lauren's purse on table - I know she's home. I love opening a bottle of wine and nibbling on goat cheese & figs while standing in the kitchen in our underwear, re-capping our days. She got me into juicing and buying Trader Joe's soy milk. I love when she gets in her "cleaning moods" and doesn't want me to help because it's therapeutic for her. I love that. Sometimes, she even sleeps with me. We love the same food, music, tv, movies, clothes, decor...I should just marry her! But since I'm prone to the males, her as my best friend will have to do.

I know her reasoning for leaving is justified and I will support her wherever she goes...because that's what friends do - no matter what. Even if she's leaving me alone in a big city, empty house, with no one to make breakfast with every morning.

On the upside, I know I will still see her when she comes to clean my house every other week.